


Saving All My Love For You

by zeigharry (mariawritesstuff)



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-29
Updated: 2013-11-29
Packaged: 2018-01-02 23:36:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,456
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1063022
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mariawritesstuff/pseuds/zeigharry
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Zayn had never been 100% devoted to Harry. If he had, they wouldn’t be hiding what they had, meeting in alcoves and sneaking into each other’s rooms in the dead of the night.</p>
<p>Or, the one where Harry tortures himself by watching/listening to Zayn and Perrie but Zayn makes it up to him by fucking him blissfully.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Saving All My Love For You

**Author's Note:**

> Based on the song of the same name by the one and only Whitney Houston.

“ _A few stolen moments is all that we share.”_

Harry shifted further into the small alcove, hunching his shoulders to create more space. One Direction was due on stage in about 30 minutes. Harry squinted at his watch for what felt like the 100th time. He was about to step out when Zayn came into sight. The older boy glanced around worriedly before darting into the alcove with Harry. He smiled.

“You alright?”

Harry nodded. Zayn pulled him down to his height and pressed his lips lovingly to Harry’s. Harry wrapped his arms around Zayn and kissed him back. It didn’t last very long, though. Zayn pulled away and quickly wiped his mouth on his sleeve. Harry pretended not to notice, instead looking down at his shoes and stuffing his hands into his pockets.

“Are you excited for the show?” Zayn tried to make small talk. Harry smiled.

“Yeah. New York is always fun.”

Zayn hummed in agreement. He was about to speak again when they heard a female voice call,

“Zayn?”

The two boys exchanged a knowing look. Zayn smiled apologetically.

“I’ll come to your room when she’s asleep. Prop the door open,” he instructed. Harry nodded. “And wait at least a minute after me before you step out.”

He placed a quick kiss on Harry’s cheek then hurried out of the alcove. Harry waited as he had been told to before exiting. He cast his gaze along the corridor. Zayn was stood with his blonde girlfriend in a group of his friends, Ant and Danny, and _her_ friend, Catherine. He had his hands around her waist and she had her arms draped over his shoulders. He looked on as the couple grinned at each other and came together to share a kiss. Their friends catcalled. Harry sighed and walked in the opposite direction.

 

* * *

 

Harry grimaced as he heard the headboard banging against the wall. Their show had ended almost three hours ago and they had returned to the hotel. For the past 10-15 minutes, Harry had been listening to Zayn going at it with his girlfriend in the next room. There was barely 20 centimetres of wall separating them and Harry could hear every little sound. He didn’t know why he was forcing himself to endure this kind of torture. Maybe he was hoping it would somehow miraculously cause him to fall out of love with Zayn, knowing that he wasn’t 100% devoted to Harry. But Harry had known that for a while. Zayn had never been 100% devoted to Harry. If he had, they wouldn’t be hiding what they had, meeting in alcoves and sneaking into each other’s rooms in the dead of the night.

 

Harry brought his knees up to his chest and clasped his hand around them. He listened to the familiar sound of Zayn climaxing and blinked back the stinging of tears in his eyes. They talked and giggled and, eventually, fell asleep. At least, one of them did. Harry could tell by the deep, steady breathing that was bordering on snores. A while after he heard the ruffling sheets that indicated one of them was getting out of bed. Harry’s eyes drifted to the door of the room, propped open with a shoe. It creaked slightly and soon Zayn’s head appeared. He grinned.

“Hey.”

Harry smiled and got off the bed. Zayn quickly glanced into the corridor then kicked the shoe away and clicked the door shut. Zayn took Harry’s hand and pulled him over to the bed. He sat down and waggled his eyebrows.

“Go on, then.”

Harry understood. He pulled off his t-shirt and tossed it away. He was slower with his jeans, partially to tease Zayn and partially because they were so tight. Zayn grunted and leaned back on his elbows, his eyes fixed on Harry’s lower half. Harry could see the bulge in Zayn’s trousers growing. It had the same effect on his own. When his trousers were around his ankles he kicked them off. He left his boxers on, though. He stepped closer to Zayn and straddled him, grinding against his erection. The older boy groaned.

“Fuck’s sake, Harry,” he growled, sitting up and pulling Harry closer. Harry grinned and continued to roll his hips against Zayn’s. Then he hopped off and pushed Zayn back down. He unbuttoned Zayn’s trousers and tugged them down, along with his boxers. Zayn’s cock slapped up. Harry knelt and licked the tip playfully, loving how Zayn shuddered. He licked it down to the base and back up.

“Fucking hurry up!” Zayn gasped.

Harry took Zayn’s entire length in his mouth and sucked hard. Zayn lifted and pulled back his hips in the same rhythm. He groaned with pleasure. When he was close he pulled Harry up pushed him onto the bed. Harry’s stomach fluttered, just like it did every time. Zayn yanked Harry’s boxers off and threw them aside.

“Two or three?” he asked, holding up his fingers.

“Three,” Harry confirmed.

Zayn grinned and spread Harry’s legs then held out his three longest fingers. Harry sucked on them before Zayn pulled them out and inserted them deep inside of him. Harry moaned, a mixture of pleasure and pain. Zayn pumped his fingers in and out quickly. Then he pulled out and positioned his cock.

“Are you sure she won't hear us?” Harry asked.

Zayn smirked.

“She’s a deep sleeper.”

And then Harry was crying out euphorically as Zayn was thrusting inside of him.

 

When Zayn finally came, he sat back to admire the boy before him. Harry had come earlier, his sticky fluid spraying all over their stomachs. He wondered what he must look like to Zayn, with cum dripping from everywhere.

“I should go…you know…clean up and everything.” Zayn rubbed the back of his neck guiltily. Harry nodded. He did know.

“I love you,” he whispered as he watched Zayn hurriedly dress. The older boy flashed him a quick smile.

“I love you too.”

And with that he dashed out of the room, shutting the door behind him. Harry lay back down and sighed as silence engulfed the room. He closed his eyes and welcomed sleep, holding on to the warmth of Zayn’s cum inside him.

 

* * *

 

Harry slammed the door of his car and marched up to Zayn’s flat. It was absolutely pouring but he couldn’t care less.  He rang the bell and pounded on the door. After a minute or so, a sleepy-looking Zayn pulled open the door.

“Oh. What’re you doing here? Lucky Perrie isn’t around –”

“What the hell is this?” Harry shoved his iPhone under Zayn’s nose. Zayn leaned back as his eyes quickly scanned the screen. He grimaced.

“Oh. That.”

“When the fuck were you going to tell me you’re engaged?”

Zayn grimaced.

“Let’s talk about this inside. People can see us out here.”

“I don't care if people see us!” Harry yelled, but he let Zayn pull him inside anyway.

“Look, Harry, I didn’t tell you before because –”

“Because what?”

“Because I didn’t want to hurt you!”

Harry laughed bitterly.

“Well, guess what, Zayn? You did. It fucking hurts!”

“I know, and I’m sorry! I just…”

“Why’re you doing this, Zayn?” Harry cried. “Why’re you even fucking with her?”

“I don't want to be! Harry, you know I don't,” Zayn yelled, “It’s a fucking PR thing! I don't want to be with her anymore than you want me to. I want to be with you, not with her.”

“Then why can't we?” Harry pleaded.

Zayn sighed frustratedly and ran his hand through his hair.

“Because management wouldn’t allow it! They told you and Louis to stay away from each other and you guys weren’t even anything. Can you imagine what they’d do to us?”

It was true. Management had asked Harry and Louis to put some distance between themselves so as not to fuel the Larry Stylinson rumours.

Harry sighed.

“I’m sick of this. I don't want to lose you and I’m tired of hiding who I am.”

Zayn wrapped his arms around Harry’s waist.

“I know,” he murmured, “I am too.”

“I wish we could just be open about this. About us.”

“And we will,” Zayn promised. “When the time is right.”

He pressed his lips tenderly to the younger boy’s. Harry let his troubles fall away and focused on the boy kissing him. Zayn stepped away.

“You should go,” he whispered. He pulled the door open. As Harry exited the flat, he remarked that Zayn didn’t even have the courage to look him in the eye.

 

* * *

 

“You alright, Haz?”

Harry looked up and saw Louis peering down concernedly at him. He smiled.

“Yeah, fine.”

Louis lowered himself into a seat at Harry’s lonely table. They were at the after-party, having just left the VMAs. But Harry didn’t feel like partying. Each time he had tried to approach Zayn or even join the group he was standing with, the boy would find an excuse to leave. Not once had he acknowledged Harry throughout the entire night, except for when they had had a quickie against the bathroom wall before the show.

Presently, Harry was trying to lose himself in champagne. Maybe its fizziness would ignite some spark in him. He looked on dejectedly as Zayn shared an intimate moment with his girlfrie – _fiancée_. Louis followed his gaze and sighed.

“Mate, why do you do this to yourself?”

Harry chuckled humourlessly.

“Trust me, I ask myself the same question everyday.”

“Why don't you try to find someone else?”

“Yeah,” Harry snorted drily, “because that worked out great the last time.”

 

**_Flashback_ **

_“Harry, are you okay?”_

_Harry glanced up. He had been having a thing with Taylor Swift since early December, when One Direction had been in New York to perform at MSG. He remembered how Louis had convinced him to call her up and spend the day with her, to take his mind off Zayn. Of course, it had been completely ineffective. All he had been able to think about was how happy Zayn and Perrie had looked when they were leaving the hotel that morning. He had wondered where they were, if they were having a good time, if he had even crossed Zayn’s mind…_

_Louis had smiled sympathetically when Harry had told him._

_“Maybe it’ll get easier with time. Maybe you’ll learn to love her,” he had said._

_But almost a month had passed and Harry still hadn’t “learnt to love” Taylor. It wasn’t that there was anything wrong with her. She just wasn’t Zayn. And, to Harry, that was a crucial flaw._

_Taylor sat on the edge of the bed. It was New Year’s Day and they had returned to their hotel room. Harry knew what she was expecting. And he wanted to give it to her in the hope that, when he did, he could move on from Zayn once and for all. He had made up his mind but now that the time had come, he couldn’t bring himself to do it._

_“Harry?” Taylor called worriedly. Harry squeezed his eyes shut. His shoulders started to shake._

_“Babe,” she whispered, pulling him close. The tears rolled down his cheeks and she comforted him as he cried._

_“Gee, is the idea of having sex with me that bad?” she joked when his sobs had lessened. Harry laughed weakly._

_“I’m sorry, Taylor. I really am. It isn’t you it’s just…” he bit his lip._

_“It’s just that I’m me,” Taylor finished. Harry looked down contritely._

_“I’m so sorry.”_

_“Right.” Taylor nodded, trying not to seem hurt. She gathered her belongings and walked out, leaving Harry all by himself._

**_End of flashback_ **

“Well maybe you need to try with a guy,” Louis pushed.

Harry shook his head.

“Guy or girl, it doesn’t matter. If it’s not Zayn, I can't be with them.”

Louis sighed but left the matter. He made small talk and kept Harry company, for which Harry was grateful. But after a while his girlfriend, Eleanor, showed up, vying for his attention.

“Are you gonna be okay, mate?” Louis asked worriedly. Harry tried to smile reassuringly.

“I’ll be fine. Go on.” He leaned back. “Hey, El.”

The pretty brunette smiled.

“Hey, Harry. Stop looking so miserable and come have fun.”

Harry laughed.

“Nah, you guys go do your lovey-dovey shit. I’m fine here.”

Eleanor pouted and opened her mouth to insist but Louis’ look told her to let it go. She smiled again and waved as they left Harry on his own once again.

 

His gaze drifted back to Zayn. Their eyes met briefly but Zayn quickly looked away. Not that Harry had been expecting anything else. His eyes followed as Zayn and Perrie headed towards the exit, hand in hand. That was his cue to leave too.

When Zayn was done with Perrie he would wait until she fell asleep then creep into Harry’s room.

 

* * *

 

Harry tugged at his sleeve as sat on the bed, waiting for Zayn. It was past 5am and he was exhausted but Zayn was supposed to come  and Harry didn’t want to miss any chance he got to spend with him. He got up and checked his hair in the mirror. Maybe if he looked good enough, Zayn would stay a little longer, maybe call off the ridiculous engagement. But even as he thought it he knew he was lying to himself.

 

The door opened and Zayn slipped inside, wrapping his arms around Harry’s waist from behind, after carefully shutting the door behind him.

“You look incredible. I’ve been struggling to control myself all evening.”

Harry giggled and flushed. Even if they both knew it hadn’t quite gone like that, it was nice to pretend it was true. Zayn guided Harry to the bed.

 

An hour or so later, they were both lain on their backs, chests rising and falling heavily. Harry was the first to speak.

“Will you call off the engagement?” he asked in a small, hopeful voice.

Zayn grimaced and sat up.

“I want to. But I can't. You know I can't.” He swung his legs off the bed and pulled his clothes on.

“Yeah, I know.” Harry muttered disappointedly. Zayn stood and smiled ruefully.

“I love you,” he assured, pressing his lips to Harry’s head.

“I know.” Harry repeated quietly as the older boy left the room.

Harry sighed. He knew Zayn wouldn’t do it. He knew they were never going to be a real couple. He knew it was always going to be like this, until Zayn got bored of him. But he couldn’t bear to be without him. So he gave Zayn his everything and took the little he got, treasuring every moment they spent together.

 

“ _So I’m saving all my love for you.”_  


End file.
